Chapter 1: Understanding My Relationship with Alcohol

In my therapy sessions, I took the courageous step of writing a letter to alcohol. I feel compelled to share this experience to demonstrate that there is no shame in embracing our humanity. In fact, even within our darkest moments, there lies a certain beauty.

I initially leaned on alcohol as a means to escape my depression before I sought help. While I was encouraged to abstain, I longed to live a life where possibilities were endless, regardless of my past. Writing this letter facilitated my healing process, and I hope that in some way, you too can find solace in my words.

Dear Alcohol,

You have been a constant presence in my life since childhood. As an adult, I've consumed you, misused you, and even abused you. You were once a source of enjoyment. I vividly recall a childhood memory of consuming too much of you at a party and being sick on a friend's lawn, only to be helped by my friends afterward.

From ages 16 to 18, I believe we had our best moments together. I enjoyed you just enough to have a good time. However, things took a downward turn as I started to rely on you to escape the increasing discomfort I felt when sober. I began to black out, get dragged from venues, and then face the embarrassment that followed.

The most troubling times were when I combined you with antidepressants. By then, I sensed that even you were tiring of me. You are not inherently evil; the real issue lay with how I misused you. My patterns of consumption disrupted my relationships, leading to lost connections. Yet, I also want to express gratitude for the comfort you provided during my most isolating times—comfort that only you and I could understand.

You've been a part of social gatherings long before my time, enhancing meals and conversations with family and friends. There is goodness in you; you unite people, and I've witnessed that. I no longer want to treat you poorly. You have a way of punishing me the next day when I do.

My hope is that one day, we can repair our relationship so that our interactions yield positive outcomes. I aspire to view you as a reminder of my journey and to appreciate you in the manner you deserve.

Yours sincerely,

Jo

If you're interested in reading my full story, please check the links below:

I am always eager to connect with like-minded individuals; feel free to follow me on Instagram @joahnnalee.

Section 1.1: The Healing Journey

In this section, I delve deeper into the complexities of my relationship with alcohol and the healing process that followed.

Chapter 2: Seeking Understanding

The first video, "Healing Becomes Impossible When Drinking Activates Your Trauma Wounds," explores how alcohol can trigger past traumas and hinder healing.