Chapter 1: A New Beginning

Recently, I embarked on my first true solo getaway since my divorce. This trip led me to laugh and cry in equal measure.

Inspired by Matthew McConaughey’s book Greenlights, I made a spontaneous decision to take a road trip to Southern California. Did I have a detailed itinerary? Not at all. However, if McConaughey could travel the country solo in his Airstream, why couldn’t I?

In reality, I feel like I’ve been idling at a red light since my divorce. Sure, I’ve experienced a few yellow lights along the way, but the true issue has been my failure to seek out the green lights or my fear of moving forward. I’ve been hesitant, afraid to explore a new version of myself.

Embracing change, even positive change, can be daunting. As creatures of habit, we often find comfort in our current situations, even if they’re not ideal. This understanding shapes my perspective on judging others who might be struggling; I see their struggles reflected in my own. We’re all navigating our own ruts.

I made the choice to escape my rut by venturing out of town. Many say, "Wherever you go, there you are," indicating that one cannot flee from themselves. Yet, my intention wasn’t to run away; I was aiming to create new experiences that would aid in my transformation.

Imagine Julia Roberts in Eat, Pray, Love. Now, let’s dive into the lessons I took away from my McConaughey-inspired solo adventure.

Tears and Laughter

Let's start with the tears first.

#### Tears:

1. I realized I missed aspects of what I had in my marriage—not the person, but the idea of companionship. Experiencing beautiful moments alone made me long for someone to share them with.

   Did this realization diminish my experience? Not at all. It reaffirmed that relationships enhance our lives.

   Relationships, like seasoning, aren’t necessary, but they certainly enrich our experiences.

2. I felt a deep longing for my children during my trip. Each time I witnessed a parent playing with their child on the beach, I wished it were my kids laughing and enjoying the moment with me.

   I yearned for them to share every trip, rather than just half of the vacations I’ll have in the future.

#### Laughter:

1. I discovered a new version of myself, challenging my limits in ways I never would have before. For instance, I taught myself to surf, even when the ocean tested my patience. Instead of getting frustrated, I laughed at my struggles, enjoying the journey of getting to know this new side of myself.
2. I met wonderful individuals along the way, including a screenwriter grappling with self-doubt, a local enjoying the waves beside me, and an older woman dealing with loneliness, mirroring my own experiences.

There were moments when I considered cutting my trip short, but then I remembered a line from Seven Pounds, where Will Smith’s character reflects, “I haven’t treated myself very well.” To which Rosario Dawson replies, “Start now.”

This resonated deeply with me; it’s never too late to acknowledge our worth. It's essential to take initiative for our happiness rather than waiting for someone else to do it for us.

I realized I had been passively waiting for life to unfold, perhaps even hoping for a miracle. However, I’ve come to believe that the real miracle lies within us.

So, rather than ending my vacation early, I treated myself to a lavish $100 steak dinner, simply because I deserved it.

Learning from Solo Travel

This video features insights about embracing solo travel after a significant life change, emphasizing personal growth and self-discovery.

Reflections on Life After Divorce

In this video, the creator shares heartfelt experiences and remarkable moments that unfolded post-divorce, highlighting the beauty of new beginnings.